I am not gonna get into my story/stories of when I was, or thought to be, not nice. That’s not what's important here, what is important is that being a jerk or being perceived as an asshole, can and will really hurt you in you life and your career. And that's no joke.
If people don't like you, they won’t work with you. If people think you are unpredictable, they will not work with you. If people feel scared or threatened by you and your presence, they will not work with you. If no one works with you, you will never work. Makes sense, right? Of course it does. And if you get no work, you will never get anything done or make any real moves forward in your career/passion/love for being a performer. Nothing can save you from yourself but you. Don’t be your own worst enemy.
In time you will see all of your “friends” & peers begin to move ahead and make strides towards their goal. You - the asshole, will only be a spectator, rooting them on. The few that still like you. Because in time people will talk and people that don’t even know you, will judge you based on other peoples words/stories about you, and then you don’t even need to do anything to have people not like you. It will be done for you. And that hole is even harder to get out of, believe me. All from not being nice!One other huge risk to consider as well about not being a jerk is how it affects your own mental state. In time you may begin to lose confidence, and after a while you may not even be worthy to book or work with. If you keep being seen as an asshole it will weigh heavily on your own psyche and eventually you will find it hard to deliver as a performer and you will be stuck in your own head and find it easy to lose sight of yourself. All from not being nice. And for what? For nothing, just to be you, alone. Being an asshole only hurts you and no one else.
You don’t wanna end up being the older person in the scene/room with a lot of stories and zero success. It stings.
So to further Bobby Hill’s point, be nice. Asshole. ; )
Contributing Writer
Monte LaMonte